Let Us Give Thanks

Strangely enough, Thanksgiving has always just seemed like a precursor to Christmas to me - sort of like the checkered flags dropping to say, "Start your engines! You are getting ready to eat and stress your way through the new year!"

I've never been into the mottled mess that is the Thanksgiving history lesson...or the Thanksgiving day parade....or the insane burst of consumerism blamed on Christmas cheer that comes right after. I never really even know how to decorate for it. It stumps me somewhat....where does one get a horn of plenty?

The main things that come to mind about Thanksgiving to me are:


(1) That sucking noise. The one that cranberry sauce makes as it's factory vacuum seal is released and it slides from the rippled can to jiggle on the plate.

(Do people eat cranberry sauce during the rest of the year? Does anyone say on a regular basis, "Hey honey, can you run by the market on the way home from work and pick up diapers, milk and cranberry sauce?")

(2) Giblet gravy. As a kid, I would eat bowls and bowls of giblet gravy just like it was soup. I'd beg for the stuff. Then one day, I found out what giblets were. That pretty much nipped that in the bud.

(3) Hand turkeys. I love turkeys made from traced hands. I once tried to decorate the top of a Thanksgiving cake by holding my hand in the air and tracing it's outline over the cake with icing. It didn't work worth a damn and I'm here to tell ya.

Anyway, Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

And Janet Leigh says, "What the...?"

Here is a little film starring my mannequin boy, Jack Lemmon: