prom madness

I thought for a few minutes before doing this entry. I wondered if I would appear catty or mean...or if it would appear obvious that I have never been to the prom and am terribly bitter..but then I realized that sometimes you are just handed something in life and well, you'd be a real dumb ass not to run with it.

And that's exactly what happened when I viewed our local paper's section devoted to this year's prom photos. I swear to you (and I could hardly believe it myself) but these were all from my little neck of the woods.

How to start it off....how about this one?



Here is the text sent in with the photo:


"This is a pic of my son, Josh and his girlfriend, Stephanie. Her dress was custom-made by Josh's grandmother. They both enjoy hunting and 4-wheeling, so it only fit that her dress was "Mossy Oak" camo ... definitely a one-of-a-kind at the prom!"


Well, I'll say!

I instantly thought that the camoflage dress was going to be the winner in the "Oh My Dear God, please redeem my Southern heritage before I have to explain this to people" category. But THEN, I saw this:



The corresponding text:

"This is my daughter Karly and her boyfriend Ben. Karly's dress was made from a rebel flag, which she designed herself."

You don't say!

I'll bet you'd like to see a full length shot of this one, right? You got it:



So, then I said to myself, "Well, it doesn't get any more redneck than that mess..." and THEN I kept going:



According to the text, that's Kayce with her brothers and sisters.

Note: You owe it to yourself to click on this photo to see it even larger.


(and you thought that bare midriffs and sub sandwiches were out for men this year)


But, I'll move on before we get bogged down in....something...that we can't get out of...

Up next:




The text with this one reads:

"John, Joey, Lauren and Katie make a face like they mean it."

(I'm not hip to the lingo, but whatever "it" is must be something else!)

Another snapshot of the young lovebirds:



(Okay, there is nothing particularly hilarious about this one except for the tragic framing of the shot...))


And another one:



The text:


"Two of the High School's Drama Department, Lisa and Eric, celebrate Prom '06 in true dramatic style."

Blows my mind! Could you EVER have guessed that these kids are in the DRAMA DEPARTMENT?


And now for something a little bit spicier:



Wow. No text needed. (except perhaps that my mama would have kicked my butt all over the deep South and beat me black and blue with the buckle of the bible belt if I had worn this dress)



Another:





"Carolyn and Mario before the 'Midnight Masquerade' prom"


(Yes...I WAS going to make some snide comment about the drama department but I was amiss..)





Text: "Carolyn is a little taken aback by Mario's suddenly 'getting into character'!"


Let's keep going..(we just have to)



I have nothing to say about this one, I just kind of thought it was sweet.

(hey, even hardened pros like me have a soft side!)

(I would like to add however that this photo would only be made better if it were superimposed over a photo of a brandy snifter and edged in a soft white haze..)

This one is next:



All together now: "SPRAY TAN!!"


And doesn't this cat just seem to have a look on his face that says, "I have no freakin' idea how I landed this HOT girl, but I am sooo the man!"




That's it for now kids... May all of your dreams have a little bit of taffeta and a lot of that bulk-buy silver star confetti in them. And may the band always play something by Journey so that you may get terribly lucky.